The floor was cold and damp and smelled like cleaning fluids.With hospital sheet wrapped around my numb body, I clung to it tightly and pull my knees close to my chest and heard my heart beating a sound of low rumbling waves on a dead ocean. My thoughts had stopped as if the story had ended but I knew it had just begun.The questions were still unanswered and the emotions were overwhelming all my logical thoughts.So I lay there quietly as not to disturb the thoughts of the present moment and wanted to hold back the future dreams of the life I was building for twenty-two years in my fairy tale marriage. Life was a fairy tale I was 17 years old and he was 17 also we were both young wide-eyed teenagers and we were full of hopes and desires and dreams that we were sharing as we talked on the phone for hours before that day at city hall when we said our I do's to each other.How did I get here in the corner on the floor in a room with a steel door closed shut and a sheet wrapped around me and sounds coming from strangers in the outer room of the hospital? My thoughts kept thinking about the love we gave each other and the promises we made to be forever in love.Everything goes around and comes around for sure as you will see in my story of my life and yours. There will be pain and hardships in every relationship with another person when you don't know yourself.I didn't know me nor did I know him.We were going through the motions of the everyday life like a script written by somebody else.We didn't know we could write our own script at that time.We were aware of the fairy tale but not the real script we could have written.Somewhere in my mind now I can think back and think back the memories we created even without our awareness we created for a purpose unknown at the time but very important in this now moment.That was the reasons for memories the good ones and the bad ones to bring back the awareness that our consciousness needed in the future. We needed to keep them for the reviewing and understanding so we could use them to become conscious in the future.Life is a timeline of events and the time is not the linear time it is divinely done by God's purpose, not man's.I was so in my human experiences and not at all thinking or using my spiritual inward intuitive gifts in my own life and problems. I am a teacher and gave all my advice to others and didn't use my own lessons for my marriage.He was a wise man and also was a teacher and our lives were devoted to helping others.We thrived on how to help others with their lives but had put our lives on hold for the good of all we came in contact with.This outward expression drove us farther apart and down roads on different journeys and this was why I was in a corner in the hospital.The journeys apart lasted 30 years and we both felt that our love was still there even though we had to experience the world's lustful loves and rejection in the relationships we chose we still felt a need to help the person we came in contact with.I never was jealous of all his wives and their children he helped to raise they are now strong men for God. I knew his purpose was to teach and give love to these women's children that had been abandon by their birth fathers. As I think back now I met so many of these men that had abandon their children so my part was the men and his was the children. I would meet a man that had children and tell them about God's unconditional love and they would stop fighting with their wives and start seeing their children.So you see God's plan and purpose of the story of two young teenagers in love and the love went out to the world and still remains with us.Every fairy tale has an evil present and we had so many people that came into our story in the flesh and in the spirit.We had relatives that told him to get rid of me and I had relatives and friends that told me to get rid of him.We listened and the falling apart became easy because we trusted them and not ourselves or God to help us.We had no awareness of the God part of the story as most people today reading this.We know our mistakes now and have forgiven ourselves and each other many times throughout the years and something still was missing.We both needed to heal our relationships with God.We are now born again as new creatures in God.The awakening on our planet has brought this renewal to all love to the hearts of the children of God.This a positive message and you all know there were negatives that we had to heal within our own selves. All the resentment and, bitterness and judgments and hateful comments we said to each other have fallen in the dust of the old selves we carried on the road to freedoms we sought for our souls. As we rise up to meet God's love we are being changed into the child of the pure heart. There is light when you become the light that dwells with your heart. On the phone , I said, "I love you"and he said,"I love you too" it doesn't matter it took 30 years to hear those words because I had them in my heart every day since that dark night of the soul God was with me keeping me warm with His love while he was on his journey working for God and I was on mine also for God. The light is with us in each of our hearts and we are seeing it now let God's love fill your heart your mind and your soul children.
Two souls as "ONE"
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